The Hunt for Siti
One early morning in the City of
Ayodhy the sun shined bright on the large mountains and green gardens of the
city. The birds chirped and the animals of the forest frolicked in joy of such
a marvelous day. Dasharatha the king of Ayodhy awakened and glanced out the
window watching the children of the city play on his lands. Looking over he
noticed his wives looking out watching the kids play. Saddened, because he was
not able to have children he decided to pay a visit to the Gods and ask for
help. He prepared his glorious horse which could travel miles of land with out
getting tired. The majestic horse was also able to fly taking the king to the
heavens to speak to the Gods. The Gods heard his plead for children and they
granted him the gift. He had three sons Rama, Lakshmana, and Bharata. Each
child received the love of their father equally but each child belonged to a
different mother. The king one day began to get very ill leading to an
incurable sickness that left him with very little time to live. He had to chose
one son to take his throne. Bharatas mother planned an evil scheme to make it
seem as if Lakshmana and Rama had committed a crime causing their father to
choose Bharata. At that moment Bharata was not present. He was out with Vishvamitra
practicing his combat skills. When he came home he found out that his father
passed away and that his brothers had been exiled from the city.
Rama
and Lakshmana make their way into the forest seeking shelter. They came across
a herd of majestic horses like the one their father owned. They round them up
and struggle for many days trying to tame the wild beast. One day the beast
escaped leaving the brothers without horses. As the brother go deeper into the
forest searching for them they come across demons lurking for food. The demons
spot the brothers and began to chase them down. The two older brothers being
trained for combat decide to fight back. The battle goes on for hours when
suddenly the demons get trampled by the horse which had escaped the brother’s barn.
The horses manage to kill one of the demons while one demon named Marichi has
escaped. The brothers have gained the trust of the horses and have joined in
friendship.
Exploring
the forest Rama comes across a city nearby. He spots a beautiful woman playing
with the animals of the wilderness. He approaches her and builds a friendship
with this beautiful woman. He finds out she is Siti princess of the city he
stumbled upon. They set a plan to visit each other in the same place for many
days to come till one day she does not show up. Worried about her absence he
goes into the village looking for answers. He finds out the king of the city
has set out a race for the hand of his princess. Rama decides to compete but
the demon Marichi has come back for revenge. The night before the race Marichi
sneaks into the barn and places a potion into the water of Ramas horse that
debilitates his speed. The day of the race Rama loses and Siti becomes the
women of another man. Rama unable to believe what has happened kidnaps Siti and
takes her to live in the forest with him. Marichi upset by their reunion
returns to the darkness of the forest.
Bharata
worried about the economy of his city is set on going into the forest to look
for his two older brothers to ask them to come back to help him. Bharata
searches for his brothers in the deep regions of the forest till one day he
finds them. He tells the brothers what has happened but his brothers refuse to
return. Bharata knowing the love Rama has for Siti decided to kidnap Siti and
leaves a trail leading back to Ayodhy. Lakashmana wakes up to the cries of his
brother searching for Siti. They set quest to look for her. They stumble across
a woman, Shurpanakha, who offers her home for the brothers to rest for a few
days. She falls in love with Rama. Rama unable to cheat on Siti refuses
Shurpanakha and tells her to never cross his path again. Feeling betrayed she
tells her brother Ravana she was abused by a wild man. Marichi has been
following the brothers through out the journey and joins forces with Ravana to
fight the brothers. Marichi knows the location of Siti and goes out and takes
her away from Bharata. Bharata finds his brother once again to tell Rama what
he has done and what has happened to Siti.
Ravana and Marichi use Siti as bait. They leave Siti in the forest, as
they follow her across the tree tops. Afraid, Siti screams for help. The
brothers hear her cry and follow the sound of her voice. The brothers find Siti
but they are surprised by Ravana and Marichi.
The
gods had lots of appreciation for their father and decide to send down the
powerful bird, Jatayu. The battle began to get extremely gruesome causing
Ravana to flee, taking Siti. Ravana takes Siti into a cave with the plan of
raping her as his sister told him the lie that Rama did the same to her. In the
cave Siti fought back giving Jatayu enough time to find them and fly down to
give Ravana a hard blow leaving him in pain. Jatayu was hit by Ravana right
before taking Siti leaving him with blurred vision. Unable to see Ravana escapes
with Siti once again. After resting Jatayu returns to tell Rama and his
brothers what happened. The brother return to the scene but there is not sign
of their trial and thus another search begins.
Rama rejects Shurpanakha : Indian Epics Images |
Bibliography: Public Domain Edition: Ramayana
Hi Alexis!
ReplyDeleteI read this version as well and I think this was a great rendition to the story. I really followed what you were saying and felt like you were creative and yet simple enough to understand. Overall you did a great job on all aspects of the story. I am excited to see what you do with other pieces throughout the semester.
Alexis, thank you for sharing this story. I really liked the part where there was a horse race to win the hand of Sita. This part made me wonder what happened during the race and what was going through Rama's head after his horse had the potion that slowed him down. Maybe you could expand on the race in the city. I think you could even make a whole story on just the aspects of the race for Sita’s hand! I don’t know if you are familiar with the animated “Robin Hood” where there is a grand archery event for the hand of the princess, but some of those elements could maybe be incorporated into your story. I also wondered who won the race and what Sita was thinking about not being able to be with Rama. You could possibly add more drama into your story by showing the devastation of both Rama and Sita, which could in turn make the reader sympathize more with your characters. Again, thank you for sharing your story and I hope these comments help you in some way.
ReplyDeleteYou rendered this story well. You did a good job of including many characters and tying them into the story. I do have a few suggestions though. First of all, read your story outloud, and typically wherever you need to take a breath is when you should put a comma into a sentence.
ReplyDeleteSecond, seperate your paragraphs by topics. So each time there is a different topic or focus, make a new paragraph for it. Vary paragraph lengths also, short paragraphs and long paragraphs. All of this is much easier on the reader. For examples, look at my story or pick up a modern novel of any time. I know the myths are sometimes structured like your story, but for modern readers chopping up paragraphs is helpful.
Additionally, adding in dialogue is always a nice touch.
"Also seperate dialogue into seperate paragraphs," I said. "This is the proper formatting for dialogue, and when a new person speaks, then they get a new paragraph."
"Does that make sense?" I added.
Anyways, think about my suggestions, I think they will improve what good stories that you already have!